I've heard medicine is a lonely career. How can I make sure I prioritize my relationships so I don't lose them over time?

Dear QMR, 
I've heard medicine is a lonely career. How can I make sure I prioritize my relationships so I don't lose them over time? 
Sincerely, 
Don’t Wanna Be All by Myself

Dear Don’t,
Thanks so much for your great question. Regardless of whether we are trying to maintain relationships with friends, family or partners and whether these individuals are in our own homes, classes, cities or afar, relationships as a medical trainee take work! So here are a few tips and tricks to try to make that work more manageable.

1. Double-up: Certain items in our schedules, like hanging out with friends, tend to get cut from the roster more liberally than others. Try to circumvent this by integrating relationships into unavoidable components of your schedule. For example, call a family member while walking home, or have a friend join you to grocery shop or meal-prep together. 

2.  Make it a date: It can sometimes be helpful to have a recurring event in your calendar to look forward to and (hopefully) stick to over time. Whether this is a weekly workout class with a classmate or a monthly brunch date with an old friend, having a regularly scheduled event can help to keep your relationships on track.

3. Patience: While balance in all aspects of our lives at all times would be ideal, we sometimes need to be patient with ourselves. Maybe we won’t be up for every class party or make it back in time for every family member’s birthday. This does not make anyone lame nor does it mean we don’t care. It is ok to forewarn those important to us as to when a busy stretch is upcoming. In fact, it can sometimes be helpful for those who care about us to know that our radio silence is not us ignoring them, but rather is sometimes a signal that we may actually need a bit of added support from them. Having this conversation ahead of time can be really helpful.

These ideas are just a start, and while at times they may be tested, your most meaningful relationships will only grow stronger with the strains of Medicine!